His Three Miracles
by turnt4turnadette
Summary: Inspired by a passage from Doctor Turner's Casebook, Patrick reflects on his recovery from war neurosis throughout the years


**Fall 1947**

Patrick lowered his baby son into the tub that night as Marianne went to the master bedroom to get ready to bed. He liked to bathe Timothy and put him in his crib when he got off of work in time to give her a break. She was surprised at how well he was at giving Timothy a bath. She just assumed he was so good at it from his profession, but he could never bring himself to tell her the truth. He tried to not think of his time at Northfield, but it occupied his mind occasionally on hard days at the surgery and briefly at Timothy's bath time. However Timothy's giggles as he rinsed him off made any bad thoughts of his past fade away. He couldn't believe that this was his life, three years ago he would have never had thought that it was possible to find happiness in life again. He was able to find love after the darkness of the war and now he had a son to add to the joy he had found since his departure from Northfield. Patrick dried him off and clothed him.

He took Timothy to his crib and whispered "Goodnight I love you" as he sat him down. After a few restless moments, Patrick smiled and breathed a sigh of relief as he drifted off into a peaceful sleep.

 **December 1959**

After losing Marianne, Patrick thought that Timothy would be his only child. He couldn't picture himself ever wanting to remarry in the early months after his great loss. But then after a whirlwind of events his unforeseen, silent love for Sister Bernadette blossomed into a marriage filled with elation to Shelagh Turner. The prospect of becoming a father again became a real and likely scenario at the time, but it all came crashing down the day scar tissue was found on her pelvic organs. It hurt him to know that they could not have a child, but he knew Shelagh's pain was even deeper. When she suggested adoption, the idea of their dream still coming true excited him. However when he saw how detailed the paperwork was he feared that his time at Northfield would be revealed, which lead him to discourage Shelagh from the Church of England Children's Society. He reluctantly filled out the forms because he didn't want to crush her dreams again. Things backfired terribly when the interview fell apart and his past with Northfield came to the harsh light. Shelagh was mad at him when he wouldn't elaborate about it, but he had to keep it behind him to stay sane. The deep, dark sadness welled up in him and before he knew it he was just going through the daily motions of life, with no room to feel anything else. Days passed and his marriage was suffering from the tension that filled their home. Then he realized that silence didn't help him in his recovery from war neurosis and it wasn't helping his marriage right now either and he knew he needed to speak. With all the courage he could muster he started the conversation as she was sewing and apologized for everything. She apologized too and they made a promise to one another to commutate more openly. Not long after that Angela entered their lives bringing great joy to their lives and all the tension and dark thoughts vanished from their home.

He smiled as he washed her that cold December night. Even though they were not related by blood, he had the same intense love for her as he did for Timothy. He rinsed her off, lifted her out of the bath and wrapped her in a towel. He chuckled has she started to cry, she never liked it when bath time ended and the cold air hit her skin. She squirmed as he put her nappy and outfit back on and her crying did not stop. He scooped her up and patted her on the back pacing the sitting room. Just as he was about to get Shelagh to help him calm her she finally let up. He kissed her head and swayed her until she feel asleep in his arms. The warm feeling of holding his sleeping infant daughter would never get old.

 **November 1962**

Patrick watched as Shelagh bathed Teddy with Angela and Timothy helping her. The sun was shining in the room and life could not have been more perfect that late afternoon. He was content with their family before the addition of Teddy, but part of him never lost hope and the day Shelagh told him that she was pregnant was one of the happiest days of his life. His hidden hope soared that day, but just when they thought they were in the clear, Shelagh had some bleeding and their hope was almost shattered. He tried his hardest to be strong for her during her hospital stay despite the uncertainties eating him on the inside. A wave of excitement and relief hit him all at once the day they were able to hear Teddy's heartbeat for the first time, it was one of the best sounds he had ever heard. He looked over Shelagh's shoulder and was beaming as they continued to wash him, thinking of how lucky he was to have them in his life.

Patrick Turner has three little miracles. When he thought that he could never be loved again after his war neurosis he met Marianne and they got married which lead to Timothy's arrival shortly after. When he thought that him and Shelagh would get rejected as adoptive parents they got an acceptance letter in the mail that lead to Angela entering their lives and strengthening their marriage. They were told they could not have a child biologically but then something changed and their physical love lead Shelagh to become pregnant with Teddy. The last eighteen years for him had a lot of ups and downs, but no matter what he knew he had his family and would never be alone.


End file.
